Mann o' Mann
Taking a day off today - not even entertaining going to the festival. I am pretty sure I am forgetting to eat 3 times a day so I need to get myself together. I go back to my favourite fast food place - CPK's, salads, pizza's and best of all the 'chipper' waiter. I get a booth and settle in and Bingo! 'Chipper' is at my table - I find out his name is Ivan and he remembers me from before - this is great... Ivan is no ordinary waiter - he's the Concubine of waiters, the Geisha of minimum wage earners, there is nothing he won't do as he bounces around like zebedee smiling and chatting. One day there will be a factory in Tawain spitting out android versions of 'Chipper dolls' that are shipped out to homes across the planet to serve us humans.
I finish up as Ivan calls me a cab, heading out to Westwood to catch up with a fellow aussie at the Palamino bar. 30 minutes into the cab ride I realise that this was a lot further away than I realised - but its nice, there is palm trees, studios and no transexuals...
I catch up with Heath at the bar, great to see another aussie out here (remembering that I have been exiled at this point), who is doing well. He loves L.A. and lets me in on all the secrets of how to enjoy yourself here. 3 Guinnesses down and I'm slurring as I haven't been drinking for a while - I have the bladder of a 4 year old which doesn't help....
As a complete freak coincidence I find out that Heath knows Tony Jennings who shot the film - he shot films for him years ago - Australia is officially the biggest smallest place in the world.
I hop back on another $40 cab ride and go straight the Mann's chinese theater which is where a lot of the big premieres are, hand prints etc. Its cheesy but I have to do it sometime. Shit - I haven't eaten again so its a stale hotdog, popcorn and coke for dinner again. The movie ticket is half the price of the meal deal... I chew on the ticket and its less cardboardy and a hell of lot tastier. The hot dog feels and tastes like they threw a pig, antelope and chihuahua into a trash compactor and hit 'crush'. The popcorn is great but is the size of a nosebag, it would feed a family of four or an average texan housewife. The cinema is amazing though - huge, auditorium, ornate, beautiful patterns and a real old theatre type feel with modern equipment - I watch 'Inside man' which is pretty good but this place would make "Coyote Ugly 2 : Dog Ugly" seem good...
On the way home I get accosted by my old friend 'cracky' who STILL wants to sleep on my floor. I decline graciously and walk backwards to my room.
I finish up as Ivan calls me a cab, heading out to Westwood to catch up with a fellow aussie at the Palamino bar. 30 minutes into the cab ride I realise that this was a lot further away than I realised - but its nice, there is palm trees, studios and no transexuals...
I catch up with Heath at the bar, great to see another aussie out here (remembering that I have been exiled at this point), who is doing well. He loves L.A. and lets me in on all the secrets of how to enjoy yourself here. 3 Guinnesses down and I'm slurring as I haven't been drinking for a while - I have the bladder of a 4 year old which doesn't help....
As a complete freak coincidence I find out that Heath knows Tony Jennings who shot the film - he shot films for him years ago - Australia is officially the biggest smallest place in the world.
I hop back on another $40 cab ride and go straight the Mann's chinese theater which is where a lot of the big premieres are, hand prints etc. Its cheesy but I have to do it sometime. Shit - I haven't eaten again so its a stale hotdog, popcorn and coke for dinner again. The movie ticket is half the price of the meal deal... I chew on the ticket and its less cardboardy and a hell of lot tastier. The hot dog feels and tastes like they threw a pig, antelope and chihuahua into a trash compactor and hit 'crush'. The popcorn is great but is the size of a nosebag, it would feed a family of four or an average texan housewife. The cinema is amazing though - huge, auditorium, ornate, beautiful patterns and a real old theatre type feel with modern equipment - I watch 'Inside man' which is pretty good but this place would make "Coyote Ugly 2 : Dog Ugly" seem good...
On the way home I get accosted by my old friend 'cracky' who STILL wants to sleep on my floor. I decline graciously and walk backwards to my room.
posted by brother | 4:39 PM
1 Comments:
"I have the bladder of a 4 year old"
That was priceless.
This was oddly riveting. I really enjoyed reading this.
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